Reign: "Fated" Review

             Wow! Is all I can say about Reign's mid-season finale. A royal run away bride, a female phantom of the opera, and a few women scorned = murder, treason, and one eye-grabbing episode. A quick intro synopsis: Mary and Francis consummate their romance and are happy in love. Yet their dreams of a blissful future are dampened by King Henry's lust for power. Hearing that Queen Mary Tudor is on her last legs, Henry believes that Mary Stewart and not Elizabeth Tudor, Bloody Mary's sister, should be next in line to take England's throne. Mary is justifiably reluctant to try the English crown on for size.

Awww This is what fairytales are made of

            The women of Reign are more dangerous than the men. Men go to battle but women wage war; their weapons are their words and nails while their battlefields are between the sheets. This is a real Game of Thrones and somehow it seems more bloody and full of plots. Kenna is a woman scorned as even from her sick bed, Henry is tired and emotionally unavailable in the face of her complaints. Personally I agree with Catherine's character judgement of Kenna of her being a child. But also like Diane says, Kenna's young and she'll learn-- the hard way--on how to survive at court. In Kenna's quest to some how deal with Diane, an unwitting priest mistakens Kenna for Diane and tells her that her plan to legitimize Bash didn't pan out.  Hold up. The priest thinks Henry's long time mistress who he's known since he was 15 still looks 15? My God!

Cheers! 

          Kenna goes to the only other person she believes would love to get rid of Diane: Catherine. Catherine, the queen of poison, doesn't seem so enthusiastic but nevertheless it's something to take her mind off her son's wedding or in her mind, impending doom. Also she figures she can kill two birds with one stone (not counting the canary she poisoned for some unknown reason). 

Diane knows how this game is played.

            Catherine waltzes into her husband's bedroom after he and his mistress did the horizontal tango. Catherine tells Diane to hit the road or she'll tell Henry that his loving, supposedly content mistress tried to steal the throne. Yet here comes the second bird hit, Catherine wants Diane to poison the annoying Kenna on her way out the door. Would Diane do such a thing to an innocent? You bet your sweet ass she would. But it seems that she didn't poison the drink. It was the castle ghost, Clarissa, who finished the job by pushing the ailing Ailey down the stone steps.

Slow your roll, you crazy bitch

           Nostradamus hates delivering bad news but he just can't seem to shut up about what he sees in that schizophrenic brain of his. At least he was lucid enough to stop Crazy Mother Bear Catherine from poisoning the Queen of France. Nostradamus seems to be the only one who knows the identity of the girl, known as Clarissa, with the potato sack on her head. In fact he seems to know her on a more personal level. We didn't see her face but in a rage after Ailey's death, Nostradamus pulls off the girl's poorly made mask and forces her to look at her handy work. Then he forces her up the stairs. Who is this Clarissa and why is she stalking Mary? We may find out after the show returns.

How can a girl choose between them?

           Poor Bash is the odd brother out in this forbidden love triangle. He's a noble guy but I doubt he'll heed his baby brother's warning about staying away from his girl. Yet what Bash and Francis have in common are scheming mothers: one trying to pull her son away from her and the other pushing her son towards her. But neither brother is one to listen to mommy. Because of Diane's ambition, Bash has to lay low for a while. Diane can pretty much take care of herself, but being noble Bash he's not eager to leave his mother to fend for herself. Yet once he gets to the stables, he'll forget all about his mom's situation.

Wow! Eight balls are less depressing than you

        Mary turns runaway bride leaving Francis at the altar all because Nostradamus was right about a few predictions. He was right about the Dragon and the Lion and Bash didn't help soothe Mary's anxiety by showing her his lion head hilt. Mary is getting more convinced by the minute that she will be the cause of Francis's death. 

I'm surprised Mary hasn't tripped in that dress.

          Ailey's tragic fall down the stairs pushes her over the edge. A shame we had to lose the clepto. Spoiler Alert: Francis dies of an abscess in the ear. The medicine of the Renaissance was as helpful as the security at that castle. But back to the story, Mary decides to run away instead of fight fate. This is why I like Elizabeth Tudor better because she had more balls than any man and she would neuter the French King if he tried to take her crown. I think the worst thing for Francis was the sight of his love riding away with his rival, the dashing Bash. Ouch that stings! Mary leaves Francis before they even got to the chapel! 

Mary may lose her heart. Better that than her head.

          So a few cliffhangers to look forward to next year. From the promos it looks like Bash is going to take advantage of Mary's confusion and sneak a few kisses. And Francis looks like a complete mess, well he just had his heart broken. Next episode will be all about the consequences of the fall out.