Almost Human: "You Are Here" Review

         "You Are Here" has to be one of my favorite episodes of Almost Human. Just a step behind "Skin", "Blood Brothers, and "Pilot". This episode Dorian and John take on a real life "magic bullet"; a bullet that never misses its target. 

I don't always use my words when I get angry but when I do, I prefer to let my gun do the talking.

          First up we see the lead in where a guy runs like a crazy person through the crowd saying: "They're gonna get me!" At first you'd think: what's this guy on? But then the crazy person (Anton) goes down. That hits the mark in drawing us in but what really keeps us is what happens after.

That's one bad ass bitch

           John has some anger issues sure, but he somehow manages to use his snide remarks to avoid expressing his feelings of anger in his Anger Management class. He gives the first laugh of the episode in fact, my favorite being: 

        "What about you, Anal? You good?"

        "It's Aneal..."

        "Okay."

Guns speak louder than words ever could.

        My god I was in stitches! But back to the matter at hand, we all know John is angry at his ex-girlfriend (which the therapist managed to spell out not so gently) but we also know that being a morose and hard-boiled cop, John Kennex isn't into sharing his feelings with anyone unless they're his closest friends (like Dorian). What I want to know is when John said he was happy and one of the reasons he could still... you know (we all know that to be the universal sign of "getting busy"), who exactly is he doing the "you know" with? If it was with Stahl then I think we'd notice that. It could be John is having some late night hook ups we don't know about. Anyway you know when they say use your words? Well John likes to use a gun to speak for him; they do sound louder. This would be the second MX John has destroyed as the MX wouldn't shut up and worst of all the MX insulted Dorian. Detective Paul was the least happy being that it was his MX that John blew away. Maldonado was willing to go easy on her best detective but Paul let out a threat of maybe he would blow Dorian's head off. Being a secret wingman, John told Paul to not even look at Dorian. Yet after the heat, John likes to cool down with some snark: 

            Maldonado: "We have a real problem here, John."

            John: "I agree. What do you think he wants to do to my ass?"

She's got the guns AND the balls to back Kennex up

         And John wasn't the only one with some quick comebacks to fire. Detective Stahl had some zingers for the douche bag that is Richard Paul. She was on fire this episode even though she sometimes plays such a small role. I still think she's vital as not only as a love interest for John but also because without her, Maldonado would be the only girl in this boy's club.

Smile! It's only a gun shot wound.

         But we know deep down, John can be a big softie. Whenever he's faced with a crying victim, he becomes all sympathetic and nice. Dorian is rubbing off on him. We see that John can be honest even when it's hard to be. Kira wants to know if John could keep a big promise like protecting her and her child and John says, "No." Maybe he should have lied since Kira flew the coop after that. We all would love to forget that ex-boyfriend or girlfriend that almost destroyed our lives but John believes the bad memories should be kept as a lesson learned or for him as a motivator to find the answers to some scary questions. Speaking of unanswered questions, Maldonado tries to interrogate Reinhardt (the villain from the Pilot) to find out what Ensyndicate wants in the evidence room. John was there, uninvited to get some answers. But being a devious son of a bitch, Reinhardt won't talk unless he gets full immunity which the chief won't give it. So the stalemate continues with Reinhardt digging his heels and smoke coming out John's ears which he blows in his boss's face.

"Hugs not Drugs"

         On to the case, the technology on this show gets more awesome and yet twisted. There's the "Magic Bullet" that can track you anywhere (Kennedy Assassin Conspiracy theorists would appreciate the homage). Then there's a Memory Scrubber which "scrubs" any memories you want to get rid of. Although John has very bad memories that anyone would want to forget, he doesn't believe in "scrubbing." John prefers those memories, using them as motive to find Anna and get some answers. Poor Dorian just keeps taking hits with damaging results. A recent one being that Dorian gets hit so hard by the "Magic Bullet" that he starts speaking Korean! Subtitles please! But Rudy is there to help out. Although he did hint that he would love to go undercover again as long as it had some sex bots. Oh Rudy you're awkwardness is so sweet and you have a heart of gold.

My brain's in need of a good scrubbing

            In the end the bad guys can't beat our favorite crime fighting duo. Kira is saved with her memories in tact. Turns out Anton only worked for the arms dealers to protect her and her daughter, Amy. She unwittingly gives John advice (as Maya, the Medium Psychic did in "Blood Brothers") which pushes him one step closer towards the sharp tongued, quick witted yet sweet and smiling brunette, Detective Stahl. I love their flirting, how it turns John into a shy teenager. They even exchange some simple gifts in the end: Stahl gives John an energy chew and John (taking a queue from Anton) uses an old fashioned pen and paper to write something down that makes Stahl laugh. It better be your number, John! John and Dorian further cement their electric bromance with Dorian pointing out that John likes him so much that he shot an MX because it insulted his bleeding heart tin man. 

Charge in guns blazing!

      So a few weeks before an episode I think will be one of the most explosive yet in the season. It's a family reunion with Dorian meeting his creator and John taking on a Sarah Conner Terminator! Can't wait!

Didn't destroy anymore MXs but the night is still young...