Once Upon A Time: Queens of Darkness or Just Drama Queens?

Should I be offended that most of these villains are bat crazy women?

                     After the Frozen cross over onto ABC's Once Upon A Time I thought, "Okay, this feels a little desperate for no reason." Truthfully it felt too soon to include the story of Frozen but it did open a storyline we were dying to uncover: who wrote Henry's Fairytale book? Who is the Author? So yeah I'll let Frozen slide but these Queens of Darkness? Feels like they're grasping at straws. 

            I have a sister who's really into that video game Kingdom Hearts which includes the Final Fantasy and Disney Film universes together. With the Disney universe comes a vast amount of worlds and dimensions we'll call alternate time lines because most of Disney's films are based off of Grimm Fairytales (some novels like Peter Pan and The Jungle Book) which take place in our world. So occasionally you'll get a normal non-magical villain but that doesn't mean they should just magically pop up with other villains. 

Hey you look different. Usually you're a phantom or a dragon

          We've heard her mentioned and saw her once (if you don't count the many times our heroes had to go below the library and face the crazy phantom), Maleficent will finally enter into play. I'm cool with that because like the Evil Queen of Snow White she's perhaps one of the most well known of the Disney Pantheon. They have similar stories involving a sleeping curse and a powerful sorceress. Sleeping Beauty is one of the top stories little girls (and the world) first learn about so yeah bring on Maleficent! See what she can do! Then there's Ursula...

I'm digging the hair though. Perfect!

            I didn't expect to see her to be honest but glad that she's making an appearance. It's kinda confusing a little I'll admit because Ariel mentioned that there was a sea goddess named Ursula who comes off as a more benevolent character as she allows mer-people to walk on land once a year. But like all goddesses she doesn't like pretenders or those stealing the spot light so Regina had a scary encounter with the goddess Ursula who threatened her to never pose as her again or else! Hopefully we get into the sea witch Ursula's background a little. In the original script of The Little Mermaid, Ursula and Trident are brother and sister so maybe we'll see that story in the show. But then there's Cruella DeVille.

What this woman really needs is psychiatric help

           Come on! I admit the song's catchy but do we have to include an animal murderer with an obsession with furs (is there a term for that by the way)? I don't really see Cruella as an evil sorceress. Yeah she's pretty evil but mostly to animals (specifically dogs). She doesn't have magic powers or anything. Yes we did Alice in Wonderland and she doesn't have powers. But she stumbled into a crazy, supernatural dimension so yes I let that slide! We met Ursula in an aquarium dealing out chum. That's funny and ironic. Where are we going to meet Cruella? A fur coat shop? Practically her heaven? Don't really see any reason for her to be there other than a need to have three queens (rule of three). 

Bitches, please!

          I feel there are plenty of other evil queens we could have used for this new story line. Maybe the writers wanted to experiment. It happens but sometimes it feels weird or it just doesn't turn out well. I'm just saying adding the psychotic, fur obsessed, pun-named queen was a bit out of the blue. Hey it could end up being a great storyline. Kingdom Hearts turned out great so maybe this one will too so I'll wait until March and see how it turns out.  

Sleepy Hollow: Every Ship is Where It Should Be

What? We're not meant to be together? Go figure

                   After Sleepy Hollow's return I see some ships coming in. I'm not one of those fans (although I respect all ships) who really want Abby and Crane together. I know their characters well enough to realize that Ichabod is in love with his wife and that won't change (unless she dies). And then there's Hawley's sudden change in sister when he shows interest in Jenny again where we know he has feelings for Abby. Since Irving has returned, I feel like some ships are about to come in.

Hawley doesn't know what he wants

          Here's why Jenny and Hawley are wrong for each other: They're both too much alike. Both are complete disasters who are impulsive and are especially bad when it comes to trusting others and by extension a healthy relationship. They need anchors which is where Irving and Abby come in for each of these outlaws.

Come on, Hawley don't back down from this challenge

        Hawley & Abby: They are very right for each other. Complete opposites who can balance each other out. They have a shared energy and together that energy can move mountains. Abby needs to loosen up though. She's too much of a soldier and we understand why but given her life is fraught with peril she needs to live a little. Hawley is a man of opportunity who prefers to have an exit strategy if things get too hot but there's a nobility there that we can get behind. He's not heartless. He's come through for our heroes a few times. Abby can show him some responsibility and Hawley can show her some relaxation tips. As Jenny said, when things get real, Hawley runs away or wrecks the relationship and his sudden interest in Jenny is exactly that. Being with Jenny is easy because he doesn't have to try but he has deep feelings for Abby and he's afraid of trying to pursue her. Abby would most likely be the same way. She's focused on her mission but that's to distract her from her feelings that we know she has about Hawley. She's been hurt too many times to trust her heart to a privateer no matter how charming she finds him and I suspect Hawley's faced the same trials.

I feel magic here

        Irving & Jenny: Like Abby and Hawley they are opposites but can balance each other out. Also both have had violent encounters with demons both literally and figuratively. I did say that Jenny needs stability and although Irving is on the run from the law and had his soul taken that doesn't mean he's not stable enough for her. Irving is the anchor Jenny needs; someone of stability and Irving needs someone to lean on when he feels like falling down. They have a defining trait that makes them brave to the point of recklessness when it comes to protecting the ones they love even though they clash with said loved ones. I felt a spark there in season 1. I believe as well as hope that the writers allow them some more time together. If either character decides to pursue this relationship it could open some story lines. I feel Jenny would be up for the challenge.

Quaint if not boring but they belong together

        Ichabod and Katrina Crane: Marriage is hard even on the best day and these two certainly could have divorced at any time but they stay together. Why? For one thing I doubt their upbringing in the 18th century would have allowed them to actually go through with a legal split but also I sense a real true love here. Katrina didn't really like Crane in the beginning but we all know that most epic love stories start out that way. Crane has shown that Katrina's lies were getting exhausting but he has shown a fortitude and desire in wanting to make the relationship work. I feel that it's Katrina's turn to show some effort. She seems to be a very independent woman even back in the 1700s where such a thing was an oddity, and that independence leads her to make decisions for everyone without consulting them allowing her to come off as condescending and arrogant. We need to get more into her back story and see where this pattern of secrecy came from because she has lied a lot about who she is and there will come a point where Crane isn't going to take it any more. I hope at least Abby points this out to Katrina. I can't think of anyone else who would do that for her. I feel that Crane and Katrina are headed for more trials but if they want it bad enough they'll weather the storm. They just need to get to know each other again.

Aww he likes it so he's putting a ring on it

          The zealous angel Orion has shown interest in Abby. More as a fellow soldier but I felt a spark there that could perhaps grow into something more and everyone loves a love triangle. You can view that between Crane, Abby, and Orion or Hawley, Abby, and Orion but either way I feel that we haven't seen the last of Orion. 

Do all angels have cat eyes now?

          All of the ships are coming into place. There is a theory floating around that if Katrina separates Abraham from the Horseman of Death then he'll die because he doesn't have a head. Possible. Either way it'll be one more character gone and so leave an almost even number of couples. I don't see Katrina falling in love with Abraham for real. So I'm sticking to these ships that have real possibility and chances for our characters to grow.

Bitch please, I'm a red headed witch I do what I want

Galavant: A Fairytale Musical Parody

Sit back and hear the tale of Galavant

                   If Monty Python's Spamalot had a one night stand with any Disney Movie the result would most likely be Galavant. I thought it would be ridiculous and silly, even the name Galavant is meant to cause instant images of absurdity; just not worth the watch but I was actually surprised when I streamed it on Hulu. It's because it was ridiculous and silly that it was funny. It's riddled with all the clichés of a fairytale but the jokes befitting a musical parody. It's a romantic comedy set in medieval times. 

More like food at first sight. Ewww

           The actors were all very well chosen. Timothy Omundson singing and dancing? Yes! Actor Joshua Sasse when asked to play the role of Galavant wanted to do a complete parody of the classic Prince Charming archetype. He didn't want to portray this perfect guy but more like really twist the image of the ideal hero and it came out fantastic. Underneath the bravado, Galavant has deep insecurities, some delusions grandeur, and an intense fear of getting his heart broken. 

Richard goes through chefs like I go through sunglasses:
A LOT!

         It's not just Galavant's Archetype that's been turned on its head, each actor has turned their classic character inside out to bring out all of their flaws making them polar opposites of the traditional (or boring) fairytale archetypes. The Hero's "True Love" is a total gold digging bitch, the Evil King is an infantile insecure maniac that I sometimes wanna hug (because I feel so bad for the guy), and the Princess is a tom boy who knows how to handle a sword. We can't forget some of the guest stars either: Weird Al, John Stamos, and Ricky Gervais all make this an entertaining romp to light up your Sunday.

Wow...this is awkward...

           I hear it's just a miniseries which is a good call although it could have also done well as a TV movie. Galavant has all the clichés of a fairytale plus a  romantic comedy with the heart and hilarity of a Disney Film. I highly recommend watching this show and see how long you can last without laughing or sighing. I can't stop watching it and the songs get stuck in my head.

We're gonna do it!

       

The Librarians: Once Upon A Time

Now time for an autopsy to find Red Riding Hood

                       I know it's been a week since I posted something but I've been sick for the last few days but I promise to do a blog post everyday. Now Once Upon A Time there were three librarians, a guardian and their book keeper and they were in for a very grim adventure...

Thank god he wasn't reading "The Hunger Games"

             One of the aspects of The Librarian franchise that I like is its ability to bend gender roles and switch them around. Example: the librarian is an intelligent man but his guardian usually appears as a warrior woman instead of as a stereotype military man. We hear Librarian and think instantly think of a woman and same with a guardian where think of man but not in this franchise. It's refreshing. Just as it was refreshing for Prince Charming to instead be Princess Charming. Yes Cassandra was getting every girl's number and free drinks. That waitress was giving her the "Hey, How you doin'" look! Jake was the Huntsman, typical he's a farm boy with this back and white sense of right and wrong. Of course Ezekiel is the Jack, the guy that gets off easy BUT although Jones could have runaway when things got tough, we see he has a heart of gold which is why the Jack usually gets off scot free. He was really cute with that little girl. Barrett isn't the feminine "damsel in distress" type but a magical book decided to cast her as a princess. It was kinda funny seeing Barrett out of her comfort zone. And did she make eyes at Cassandra in the library? I love this show. 

Get over it, Jake. Cassandra is Prince Charming
and you can trust Charming

             I'm so glad we finally readdressed Stone's trust issues with Cassandra. I like Jake but come on! Everyone else forgave Cassandra for what she did because she has a ticking time bomb in her head ready to go off in a few years. Like Ezekiel pointed out anyone would have done the same thing and stuck the landing but Cassandra decided to save Flynn. Jake doesn't hate Cassandra but not trusting her feels like he's punishing her more and that's just not cool. I wish these trust issues were addressed in the end of the episode too but at least it was mentioned and we're heading toward the next step in rebuilding that bridge of trust between Jake and Cassandra. Jenkins made a rare trip out of the Annex this episode. He's kinda macabre but I expected that from a guy who doesn't socialize much. I actually like him for his dark sense of humor. 

Wow, what a big everything that wolf has!
And it's all the better to kill us with!

             Disney was called out in this episode for its White Washing of classic bloody Grimm Fairytales. Psychotic behavior, dismemberment, and cannibalism are all a part of fairytale tradition. Though there were no name drops per say, Cassandra threw out some aspects of cartoon fairytales like from Cinderella. Our heroes were in real danger of losing when the wolves were at their castle doors. Reading really can be dangerous especially if the story teller is a disgruntled old librarian (who is again a dude but really bitter) juiced on the power to shape reality. I was shocked that someone who seemed like such a sweet old guy was okay with draining and killing a little girl! Sounds like a classic Grimm Fairytale but we got a happy ending with Jamie becoming the hero and destroying the evil warlock. 

See any wolves?

            I was actually more occupied with the character in this episode than story because each character was sort of challenged in a way. Jake and Cassandra would be a great couple and Jake has shown some feeling towards her even though he still flirts with Lamia (the moron) but there's still this issue of trust that he isn't even trying to get over. I feel like that is in connection with his reasons for never publishing under his own name or telling his family that he's an art historian genius. Zeke is reaching a point where he's becoming so arrogant that it's becoming a bit unbearable. I feel like one day he'll be in a situation where his luck will run out though. He needs to be knocked down a peg to really grow but I will admit he's exhibited a trait of loyalty to the Library and his team mates. I think Barrett is really settling into her guardian role by stepping back a bit instead of being too controlling. The Librarians aren't just high IQs they can come together in a fist fight. 

That's an owl... I guess they couldn't get a falcon.

            New Librarians on tonight and I can't wait to see if Jake can work out his trust issues and that Ezekiel gets schooled in some humility. I feel like were heading towards some serious character growth here.

3 Things To Love About NBC's Constantine

Giving Hell...Hell

                       Still no word from NBC about renewal or cancelation of it's new gritty, dark, engaging show Constantine. I feel like I'm beating a dead horse but there are plenty of reasons for NBC to renew it but here are my top three reasons. 

Yikes! She couldn't afford plastic surgery?

Burn, baby, burn!

        1. Faithful Rendition Makes A Must Watch

              Before the film Constantine I didn't know anything about Hellblazers or the cigarette chewing, smart ass, wise cracker from Liverpool John Constantine. Needless to say the film was a bad first impression. I looked up the comic after that and was as appalled as the Hellblazers fandom at the film. Although it was an interesting plot, the cast was poorly chosen. There were no Brits available? How did we get stuck with Keanu Reeves and Shia LaBeouf? So when I heard that NBC was doing a show I groaned with other Hellblazer fans. But after seeing the Pilot I was unexpectedly blown away. Matt Ryan was an excellent choice for the lead. Not only is his look for the character spot on (also he's Welsh) but Matt Ryan has settled well enough into the role that he makes us sympathize and cheer for John. And John's not a good guy. He's not in it to save the world though that's what he usually ends up doing. He's arrogant, stubborn, makes inappropriate jokes, and gives little regard for collateral damage. However, Matt Ryan gives a great enough performance that brings out the tortured side of John that suffers from guilt, loneliness and desperation and that he's had a dark childhood with an abusive father who blames poor John for his mother dying in childbirth. He makes us want John to succeed.

This is perhaps the one and only time
we'll ever hear John say "Please" for anything

          Matt Ryan isn't the only well cast character. Angélica Celaya as the optimistic fiery psychic Zed perfectly counteracts with John's pessimism, sullen outlook. Then there's Harold Perrineau as the angel Manny. Harold brings a sort of charisma to the cryptic angel. He takes some pleasure in frustrating John. But I see there's more to Manny. It seems that John is becoming somewhat of a bad influence on the dutiful angel, which I'm not sure is a good or bad thing yet. Charles Halford brings an enigmatic energy to Chas. He makes me curious to want to know more about him. Like is he already dead? How can he die and come back? A wonderful supporting cast with an energetic lead makes for great television and because of each character's mystery and personality one could draw out 5 or 6 seasons based on them alone.

Buck toothed fangs? Is she from the South?

      2. The Rising Darkness Makes Everything Go Bump In the Night

              The issue that some fantasy shows have is that they can get lost in doing creature features each week. While that's interesting, story lines can get mixed or lost leaving the viewer confused and just as lost. The Rising Darkness pulls everything together. Every spell gone wrong and creature summoned is connected creating a consistent story line that will keep viewers from getting lost and still we get to see the dark aspects of John Constantine's world. It even brings into question who started the whole thing? Was it the First of the Fallen? Or even Nergal? That connects John's personal mission in getting Astra back, a child that John sent to hell (by accident of course). 

The least Manny could have done was snuck in some whiskey.
Boll*cks

This angel is much prettier than John's guardian angel

           I like the twist on angels that the producers took on them in this show. Manny isn't an Aryan and he has cat eyes. Seems like all angels have cat eyes here which gives them one extra trait that separates them from humans. The creatures we've seen so far just scream bloody gore horror which really speaks to my blood loving gory side. 

That's called smoking, genius

       When I heard that Constantine was going to air on NBC I thought: "Oh man... they're gonna sanitize it." But that's not the case. NBC gave the producers plenty of leeway with this one and Constantine has pretty dark content: murder, rape, and even some nicotine addiction. First few episodes you barely see John's nasty habit, only hints but now we see him light up and take a puff more often. Cigarettes are basically John Constantine's signature.  

You know, love, shagging a nun is on my bucket list

      3. Popularity Spreading Like Hell Fire

               Low numbers at first but after a few episodes the numbers rose real fast. Through word of mouth and advertising Constantine's fandom has been growing. This show has the potential to be right up there with The Walking Dead (not a fan of zombies personally). People who don't even know about the Hellblazers comics can and are getting sucked into the show. Producers and actors continue to use Twitter to their advantage. Smart idea. Getting fans to care about your project is a sure fire way of getting their support especially if you communicate with them. It gives fans an extra boost of confidence and makes their day when their favorite actors and people involved with the show tweet with them. At this rate the numbers for Constantine will outshine Grimm which is now on it's fourth season. 

Bloody gory is what I like

         Great actors, great story, all around the perfect show to binge on and to share with friends who are fans of gore and the occult. I hope that NBC realizes the gem they have and not give it up. There are very few shows that blow me away on TV today so it's nice to add Constantine to the list. 

              

      

Dominion: Eviction Success Theories

Can Michael even read that book? Basically it's blank

                         Still have a while before Season 2 so to slake my thirst for Dominion I've decided to play around with theories. One theory is about the process of angel evictions. So far Alex has only been successful with evicting Gabriel from Louis but why were the others a failure?

That book has seen better days

               The origin of the eviction process goes back to one of the first prophets who wrote the Apocryphar (don't know if I'm spelling that right). The book contains the eviction needed to expel an angel. So I can assume that those prophets have had success or at least some success with evicting an angel without doing too much damage to the human host. But what are the factors that helped them?

Clementine Out

               My opinion is that if someone is possessed by a lower angel an eviction must be done as soon as possible. The longer the wait the harder it becomes to separate spirit from host. The angel seems to bond quickly with its host, making it easier to take full control and banish the human soul to some dark place. Clementine's case brought up some interesting questions about the relationship between host and angel. The angel was in control but Clementine was still conscious of events taking place. I think it came to a point where the angel and host merged identities making one indistinguishable from the other. It would explain why sometimes the 8-ball would call Claire her daughter. 

Sanctify!

Ha ha ha-uh Uh Oh

        But as Michael said, spiritual matters have never been an exact science. They're more of an art so plenty of room for trial and error. But why was the eviction of Gabriel more successful? I think the time and the subject were factors. Gabriel wasn't in Louis for long and Louis is an angel, stronger than a human in keeping his identity separate and able to recover physically.  

Already Alex doesn't need the book. That's progress

        I can't wait for season 2 where we can find out more about evictions and what other things Alex can do. Evictions are definitely an interesting story line since angel possessions have been happening for thousands of years in the Dominion universe which changes the stakes a little and begs the question if Alex can evict angels then would that bring the war between angels and humans closer to an end?

        

TVD: Kai Crushing On Elena?

This could be fake but I don't care! I like this idea!

                     I've only just recently heard this through the Twitter gossip vine. There are rumors going around that our new psycho villain Kai may start crushing on another Mystic Falls local and no she's not blond. She's none other than Doppelgänger Elena Gilbert. Poor Elena. Either people want to kill her or kiss her. But that opens up some interesting story lines. She doesn't remember loving Damon and although she's trying to get to know him again another crazy emotionally damaged killer may believe he has a chance at winning the brown eyed vamp.

Where's Ms. Cuddles?

           At first I thought Bonnie would be first on Kai's flirt list but she's still stuck in purgatory and no hint of coming back as of yet (and she will come back I hear so have a little more patience). Also after last year's Christmas cliff hanger it looks like Kai and Elena will be spending some quality time together. You remember when Klaus needed Elena to make hybrids? Maybe Kai needs her doppelgänger blood for some spell. He's super juiced right now so I'm sure his sick little mind is working out some ideas for nasty spells. Then again he may want to get back at Damon for leaving him in purgatory. 

Ms. Cuddles says Kai's sorry, bonnie...

Please say you're gonna use that to carve the turkey

      Still you know how that hostage/captor situation has a habit of working. Sometimes the prisoner and the guard get close leading to either Stockholm Syndrome or Lima Syndrome (which is the exact opposite of Stockholm Syndrome where the captor emotionally connects and bonds with the hostage). I doubt Elena is weak minded enough to fall for Kai but like Klaus, Kai is very lonely. He may be more open to an emotional connection. You can argue that Elena already fell for Damon despite his monstrous nature and so Kai may think she could love him just as much; getting past his horrible sins. 

What is it about Elena that attracts the psychos?

Children of the Corn much?

      We fell in love with Klaus when we got deeper into his story. Even more so when he started showing some hint of humanity when he started falling in love with Caroline. If Kai just remains a psychotic killer bent on murder and mayhem he won't be much of a sympathetic character. Besides Elena's last boyfriend outside the Salvatore Spectrum was boring old human Liam. Kai seems much more interesting. If rumors prove true then Kai's courtship with Elena will be more aggressive and fascinating and give us a deeper look into his tortured character.